How Do You Respond to the Differences?

“Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

Ephesians 5:33

Ponder This

What is a man’s greatest desire? He wants to be admired; he wants to be respected. She is a lover, but he is an achiever. God gave woman a nurturing instinct, but God told man “to tend and keep” the garden (Genesis 2:15). God equipped him mentally to do that; God gave him that tough exterior. The man wants to be admired by the woman. I want Joyce to admire me. I get more of a blessing when Joyce admires me and says, “Adrian, you are wonderful.” She gets a blessing when I am romantic and loving and tender toward her.

When a woman tells a man a problem, do you know what the average man will do? He’ll try to fix it. She doesn’t want you to fix it. Joyce was in the airport in Knoxville, and she missed a plane. She called me and said, “I just missed the plane.” I said, “Well, go to another counter.” She said, “I did that, I’m telling you I just missed the plane.” She did not want me to fix it. Trying to fix it didn’t allow me to hear her; she wanted sympathy. Men, your wives don’t always want you to fix it, they just want you to hug them and love them. They want love, but what does a man want? A man wants admiration. We can serve one another when we understand and celebrate our differences.

  • Do you view differences with others as positive or negative? Why?
  • How can knowing your differences change the way you serve others?

Practice This

Consider how you can grow in respect or love for your spouse if you are married. If you are not married, consider how you can grow in understanding how to serve those around you.

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